Healing Isn't Linear: Why Setbacks Don't Mean You're Failing

We love to imagine healing as a straight path—one with milestones, progress markers, and a finish line. But real healing? It rarely looks like that.

It’s more like a winding road with sharp turns, hidden potholes, beautiful overlooks, and detours you never saw coming. Some days, you’ll feel strong, hopeful, and full of light. Other days, it may feel like you’ve taken three steps back. That doesn’t mean you’re broken and it definitely doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It means you’re human.

Progress Can Look Like a Pause

If you’ve ever found yourself thinking, “Why am I still feeling this way? I thought I was past this,” you’re not alone. One of the biggest myths about healing is that it’s a one-and-done journey. That once you’ve left the toxic relationship, started therapy, or embraced a new chapter, you’ll never hurt the same way again. Or you won't romantasize and miss the "good times."

But healing doesn’t erase the past—it helps you carry it differently.

Sometimes the weight resurfaces. A memory is triggered. A rough day unearths old emotions and suddenly, the ache returns. That doesn’t erase your growth. It doesn’t cancel out all the hard work you’ve done. It simply means you’re still walking the path—and that’s okay.

Setbacks Are Part of the Process

What if we started seeing setbacks not as failures, but as invitations?

An invitation to slow down.

To reflect.

To revisit something we may have skipped over.

To tend to a wound that still needs care.

Each stumble is an opportunity to deepen your understanding of yourself and strengthen the tools you’ve been building. Growth isn’t about never falling—it’s about how you rise when you do.

You Are Not Starting Over

One of the most discouraging lies we tell ourselves during a setback is, “I’m back at square one.” But here’s the truth:

You’ve never gone back to square one.

The version of you who is hurting today is not the same woman who first began this journey. She knows more now. She’s loved harder, learned boundaries, discovered resilience, and gathered wisdom. Even on your hardest days, you are further along than you realize.

Trust that.

Honor Every Version of You

Healing asks for tenderness. Not perfection.

It’s okay to have bad days. It’s okay to cry over things you thought you’d “gotten over.” It’s okay to feel everything deeply. That doesn’t make you weak—it makes you real.

Honor the version of you that kept going when things felt impossible. Honor the one who’s resting today. Honor the one who might rise stronger tomorrow.

All of you is worthy. All of you belongs.

Keep Rising

You’re not alone in the messy middle. Every brave woman on the path of healing knows the terrain is uneven. But here’s the gift in the journey: even in the setback, you’re still soaring.

Maybe not in giant leaps today.

Maybe not with your wings fully spread.

But you’re still rising. One breath, one step, one act of courage at a time.

So don’t mistake the detour for a dead end. Keep going, love. Your story isn’t over.

You were made to rise. You were made to fly.

xoxo,

fly girl